CanadianPerspective And Blogmaster "canuk" Named Person Of The Year!!!!!

I am ASTOUNDED that CanadianPerspective and its' EXTREMELY UNBIASED and BRILLIANT blog-master canuk were even being considered for this prestigious award let alone be named Time Magazine's Person of the Year. Damn, and I don't even have a "thank-you speech" prepared. Do you think perhaps King George would lend me his writer? After all he appears to be the best to put a good spin on anything. Well of course I start off by thanking God (who I am sure had nothing better to do except examine every human and/or other species), before blessing me with this award. I hear I outnumbered Focus on the Familiy's James Dobson by only ONE vote. Then of course the sharing of this award goes to my agent Corrine the rose lady, and of course my publisher Blogger. If I have missed anyone please forgive me. It is just that I am simply out of words....LOL. My next achievement (that has totally eluded me year after year), will be The Weblog Awards. Of course an investigation is now underway as to why the rumor that I didn't win or even receive a nomination this year is being circulated and who is responsible. Sources close to the investigation are telling me the votes were all tallied by one of them there electronic voting machines, and of course there is no paper trail available. Believe me, a law suit is in the works and my team will be headed by none other than Republican Lawman Jim Baker, who is known to demonstrate God-like abilities in front of the Supreme Court. Joining him as character witnesses will be Tom DeLay, Karl Rove, Randy "Duke" Cunningham, and of course that bastion of law-abiding credentials Jack Abramoff. Negotiations are still going on with Rep. William Jefferson (D-LA)not only to make this a bi-partisan investigation, but also I hear he has an enormous freezer where we can stash our beer. Apparently as soon as Baker can knock some sense into that King George guy over his last report (the ISG's "Operation New Direction") which it is said is being totally rejected, the Iraq Security Group's "Operation New Direction", he will be available for my case. There is also an EXTREMELY VISCIOUS RUMOR making the rounds that the award was actually given to the entire population, (and that EVEN MY AGENT CORRINE won) for their accomplishments using technology. Of course just as Mark Foley expects to be vindicated from the baseless rumors about him, I have to say I also will be vindicated from this rumor, and the 2006 award will be rescinded and given to yours truly.